Collaboration is terrifying…

And I’m an indie author saying this, so I can already feel the chill running down my spine from admitting it.

Reaching out takes a ton of mental energy. Staring at a screen and trying to make words make sense takes a ton of mental energy. Attempting to find a cool person on the internet who makes cool content things (songs, books, comics, art, indie video games, you name it).

Saying “hi” to that kid you didn’t know in the lunch room is scary.

And just because it’s on the internet, it doesn’t make it any less scary to say “hi”.

Reaching out to that person who might have more followers than you or be a little older or further down the road in their career might be intimidating.

No, full stop, it is intimidating.

I don’t know anybody who goes through the world with 5000% confidence. We all have our moments where we need to sit down and take a breather. It’s only natural. As they say– everyone has got to use the bathroom and sleep sometime. We’re only human, even the coolest humans gotta take a break to pee.

Even the most glamorous people I know say that confidence is faking it. Not many people are “on” all the time. Even though smiling takes less muscles than a frown, it still takes a lot of muscles.

I’ve been getting better about forgiving myself if I get a little scared or exhausted about reaching out to other creatives. Sometimes, I even chuck my phone (gently and aiming for a pillow) as soon as I send a particularly long message asking them about their creative journey or what projects they’re starting.

But there’s something, a little phrase, that I say to myself that helps me when I feel like there’s no point in reaching out at all.

And that phrase, to help you make a new creative friend, is this.

“If you try something and get rejected, you still have a higher percentage chance to get accepted than you did if you didn’t try at all.”

It’s like this, lemme paint a picture (or try my best) of what that phrase means.

If you paint a picture every day, you always have a chance that you’ll paint the next great work of art. The next Picasso or Basquiat. (Even if it’s a small chance, it’s still a chance!)

But if you never pick up that paintbrush, you have no chance at all.

So, I know it’s scary, and I know it can feel as intimidating as all heck. But trust me, my fellow creative friends, collaborating on new projects or asking for advice from other creatives is one of the best things you can do.

We all need friends in life, and creation is no solitary pursuit.

I’m cheering you on, loves. Here goes!

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